


Moments

by Medie



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 11:43:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5784109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Medie/pseuds/Medie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You have a lot of moments when you hang out with Avengers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Moments

**Author's Note:**

  * For [janus_74 (tanner)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tanner/gifts).



> Somehow, in pondering fic, I landed on the idea of 'what if it was Darcy in that Avengers AoU scene' and then got THIS.

You have a lot of moments when you hang out with Avengers. Big moments, little moments, mostly okay moments, and then there are the _moments_.

They're mostly cool moments with brief side-trips into mind-numbing terror. Like, oh, when your best friend gets a super ancient and mystical energy zapped into her and you spend a ridiculous amount of time running though the streets of London dodging _alien elves_.

Okay, so sometimes the mind-numbing terror is also completely fucking ridiculous.

What no one tells you is that sleeping with one flips some invisible switch and you get the cool, the mind-numbing terror, and the completely fucking ridiculous, _all at once_.

And it goes double for Clint Barton. 

Actually, it's way worse than double, but Darcy isn't sure anyone can count that high. 

Because, yeah, there's that moment when you're Skyping your best friend (who is totally revolutionizing science again while eating poptarts in her underwear) and your boyfriend lands on the roof with his band with a super evil android army on his tail.

Clint is just lucky he's damn good in bed or this would probably be a 'sleeping on the couch to infinity' kind of moment. To be fair, he has those moments a lot. Like, ridiculously frequently. 

"So, let's be clear, your supersecret hideyhole is a building in Bed-Stuy? _Really_?" 

It's probably disloyal or something that she snickers into her coffee cup, but she totally does. Because, seriously, it's not like she would have expected it. 

Okay, so the first time that she met him, he was pretending to just be some local guy in a coffee shop in New Mexico and doing the worst job _ever_ , but it's pretty much a theme for him. Seriously, as super dangerous assassin, Clint is actually competent, as a _person_? He'd better have Nat along as escort in case coffee decides to go to war.

"Well, would _you_ have thought of it?" Clint asks. "It's best we've got. My name's not on the least. Fuy's got this place as off the books as he can get it." The funniest part is when Clint says, "Not that matters, I'm pretty sure I'm dead already. There's not a chance in hell Darce missed any of this and she's probably _pissed_."

Nobody even gets a chance to pounce on the 'Darce' slip, because the hatch is already opening and, cool, Thor looks totally freaked right now.

She is like five nothing and she scares a _god_. That is so fucking good for her ego. So good. 

Still, she'll give her golden space labrador this, he recovers quickly. He gets points for way he beams a smile and throws out his arms for her. "Fairest Darcy!" 

It's sweet, it is, and totally heartwarming and shit, but she also kind of wants to ventilate him. Jane wouldn't like that, probably, so she'll have to settle for scaring him a little. 

"Don't you fairest Darcy me," she says, mustering up a good scowl. 

It must do the trick because even Cap gets guilty-faced. 

_Sweet_.

She puts her hands on her hips. "Who was the genius who thought killer robots would be a great way to liven up the weekend? You guys look worse than Jane on her eighth box of poptarts." 

Stark sucks in a breath, a bunch of them look his way, but then Clint's talking, "Took out a Hydra base. They had a couple eurotrash kids with powers. Mind-fuckery happened and voila; killer robots."

"Somebody got mindfucked _AGAIN_?" Darcy ducks forward to help Clint with Natasha. "Has anyone ever told you guys that your lives sound like a bad episode of Buffy? Like, not even a so bad it's good, just straight up _awful_." 

"Well, there's a killer robot bent on world domination, so yeah, we noticed." 

Clint looks from Darcy to Nick where he's still standing in the doorway, backlit by the stairwell all dramatic and shit. "Something you'd like to tell me?"

She grins. "Oh, yeah, your boss left one of those weirdass messages that said he'd be dropping by. Weird since he's supposed to be totally dead and stuff." She doesn't get _everything_ from the news and Nick still fucking owes her over the whole iPod thing. 

It creeps Clint out, but she figures that since she's still breathing, she just might be Nick Fury's BFF. 

"Just so we're clear, you're still not allowed to recruit her," Clint says, trying for serious face. He's not really that good at it, not when he's _trying_ to do it, so it's mostly just hilarious, but seriously? "I mean it."

"Seems to me, Barton, neither of us really would have much of a choice if that's what she decided she wanted to do." Nick sticks his hands in his pockets and rocks on his heels a bit, like he's finding the whole thing fucking hilarious and, well, he probably is. Killer robots are probably just Tuesday when you're Nick Fury. 

Clint looks at her. "You are _not_ getting recruited."

"Of course not," she shrugs. "Stopping the world from ending is just my weekend gig. I've got a science goddess to keep in actual food and semi-normal sleep patterns." 

Darcy is vaguely aware that her scale of 'weird' is also similarly skewed, but she's so not in his league yet. 

She's also totally aware that there's a yet.

She's dating Hawkeye, her best friend is totally banging a god, and occasionally the world likes to try and end. There's pretty much no chance of normal happening so the yet is always, always implied.

"So, right, Nick, you put the coffee on, I'll get the first aid kit, and Star Spangled Sassy Pants back there can feed Lucky." Darcy looks at Stark and grins. "Do we need to get the can-opener or can you handle it?"

He blinks. "Barton? This woman is entirely too cool for you. Admit it. You're totally just using him as a cover for your secret affair with Romanoff."

"If I am, it's probably not that bright to ask me about it," Darcy says, and then leans into Natasha just a little. "Too many witnesses?"

Natasha considers it. "Not necessarily. They can be managed."

Darcy tries for a sage nod. _Awesome_. "Cool." She looks at Clint. "Sorry, but she's like _way_ hotter than you. Now, c'mon, let's get you guys inside and out of sight."

Whatever moment is her last; it won't be at the hands of killer robots. She's got standards about shit like this.

She did mention the cool, the mind-numbing terror, and the completely fucking ridiculous, all at once, right?

And that it goes double when Clint's involved?

Because, _yeah_.


End file.
